Tuesday 18 May

~ Daisy ~


I guessed that Charlie took something while we were at the club. His pupils were dilated, and he bounced around with renewed energy when he came back to our table. It was almost two in the morning. I’d been hoping to get back to the hotel, but he wanted to stay longer. I plastered a smile on my face and pretended to be enjoying myself talking to the vapid blonde next to me. She barely recognised me as human, more some bizarre sub-species that didn’t have inch-thick makeup, hair extensions and acrylic fingernails. I also didn’t have a skeletal anorexic frame. I ate real food, instead of pushing an over-priced lettuce leaf around my plate. Wow, we had so much to talk about.

The guy on my other side was completely off his head and mumbling into his drinks, while feeling up the glossy redhead in his lap. Her fake boobs were the only flesh on her entire body. Like the blonde, her bones were practically on show, her skin so pale you could see the veins. The other side of the table was no better. Two heavily tattooed guys racing their drinks and betting on how quickly, and how many times, they could pull. They bragged about how many women they’d had, the most unusual positions and locations, the size of their tits… I just ignored them.

This was the party lifestyle that Charlie loved so much. It bored me rigid.

He saw me hiding a yawn and took pity, snogging me in front of everyone before guiding me outside to the waiting limo, the remnants of a bottle of vodka clutched in his hand. He took another swig straight from the bottle as we climbed in, his eyes glittering in the streetlights. Leaning forward, he asked the driver to take us back to the hotel the long way round, whatever that meant, then pressed a button to activate the privacy partition.

“Well, babe, you wanna be a proper rock chick?”

He sprawled across the massive back seats, and pulled me into his arms for a prolonged kiss. His pupils were dilated so far that his eyes were almost completely black in the dimly lit interior. His smile was genuine though, and his hard-on bulged against his jeans as I leaned across his lap.

“Go on then, what would make me a ‘proper’ rock chick?” I felt happier now I had him to myself, and amused by his posturing, so different from the Charlie I knew in private.

“Two things.” He grinned, a daring gleam in his eyes as he slowly unzipped his jeans. “The mandatory blow-job and the obligatory limo-shag.”

I glanced at the partition; it looked solid enough. “Won’t he hear us? Or see us?”

“That’s why it’s called a privacy partition, babe. He sees nothing, hears nothing.” He’d abandoned the vodka and he now caressed me with his hands, sliding underneath my t-shirt and across my lovely new bra. “You look so horny in this, Daisy. See what you do to me?”

And the cocaine had nothing to do with it? I stifled my tart reply, with some difficulty. The next thought that semaphored across my tired brain was to wonder just how many times he’d done this, and with how many girls?

I knelt on the floor of the limo and took him in my hands, and then I glanced up at him, hoping my insecurity didn’t show. His eyes were half closed. Did he even know it was me?

Taking a quick breath, I ran my tongue across the head and licked away the pearl of pre-cum that hung there. He groaned softly and lay back, running his hands through my hair. A little more confident, I closed my mouth around his dick and took as much of it as I could. It was different in bed. Doing it here, while the car cruised through the deserted streets, felt weird. Maybe I was just tired. Maybe I wasn’t enough for him. I sucked harder, and squeezed his balls the way I knew he liked it.

“Oh yeah,” he growled in approval. “That’s it, right there, baby.”

He hadn’t finished when he whispered my name. I opened my eyes to see him staring down at me, intent and dazed looking. “Come up here, Daisy.”

I scrambled up on the seat beside him, and he wrapped his arms around me and kissed me urgently, before laying me out on the seat and fumbling with my panties. Moments later, he’d fitted a condom and was inside me, dropping kisses across my breasts and suckling my nipples through the silk of the bra. What a surreal experience.

I should have been revelling in the encounter.

I wasn’t. I felt disembodied again, as I had in the changing room earlier.

Street lights flashed by in the dead of night, and the car purred like a giant cat, the movements all cushioned and steady. Rock music blasted out from hidden speakers. I recognised a Killers track from the gig earlier. Charlie’s moves, were slow and steady, his lips and fingers everywhere.

I suddenly snapped back to the moment, Charlie had spoken. “What, babe?” I managed to reply.

“You’re not a rock chick, Daisy.”

“Oh?” Was I not good enough to enter that particular hall of fame? Another wave of insecurity crashed over me.

He thrust hard, drawing a groan from me, and held himself deep inside, our hips pressing together. “You’re more than that. You’re special.” He withdrew, slowly, with immense control, then slammed right back in again.

I gasped, pulling his face closer, pressing my lips to his. He grunted, eyes half closed, pulled back and drove hard in again. “I think I’m in love with you.” He murmured the words, almost to himself.

Despite my tiredness, my anxiety at shagging in the back of a limo—for God’s sake, how clichéd was that—I could only writhe beneath him as my climax tore through me. Did he really say that?

Or did I imagine it?




Snuggled together in bed, in that ridiculously over-decorated hotel room, I pondered the night. Charlie slept beside me, one hand curved around my breast. The difference in our daily lives was immense. When he wasn’t in the studio or touring, this was his life. He drank and partied. He was a city boy, always searching for the newest thing, the latest craze, the freshest idea to get a buzz. He would flit from one thing to the next, restless and relentless, bored at the drop of a hat, much like a young child.

I eased closer to his body, and acknowledged that he unleashed feelings in me that were entirely adult.

I had to get back to work soon. I’d told Alex I’d only be a couple of days. Wide awake now, I slipped out of bed and tiptoed to the kitchen area to get a drink of water.

Charlie’s gentle snores drifted across the room; there was little chance of me disturbing him. I took my glass to the windows and stared out at the grey pre-dawn skies of London. My mind churned in furious circles. There were too many things to think about, all clamouring for attention at once. I tried to sift through them.

This fairytale existence with Charlie. He made everything feel like an adventure. He’d break my heart if I let him, but I couldn’t resist him.

Then there was my job. I loved working for Alex and Sylvie, taking care of Callum and being a part of their lively household. I loved the house at Rhosneigr, the quiet and remoteness of the location, the beach just minutes away and the vast open skies. The emptiness of the surrounding countryside. I’d lived in cities, grown up in Manchester, but I felt I’d found my true home there.

What possible chance did I have for any kind of long-term arrangement with Charlie? With him living in London and me in Wales, snatching the odd weekend here and there? There would be long periods of time when he moved up to Alex’s, when they were rehearsing or recording in his basement studio, but nothing more was planned in the short term. Alex talked of taking at least a year off from Event Horizon. Charlie had muttered about a solo project.

Where did that leave us? If there even was an ‘us’?

One thing was certain. If any changes had to be made, they were down to me. Did I love Charlie enough to risk my heart?

I wandered back to the bed, and sat on the edge while I sipped some more water. I had to tell him how I felt. And take it from there.








Wednesday 19 May

~ Charlie ~


As lazy mornings went, this one rated a medium. Slight hangover, but a couple of Panadols and a jug of Bucks Fizz later, I felt ready to face the day.

Daisy, my almost-girlfriend, was subdued. She claimed to be tired and not used to late nights, but I had to laugh. That wasn’t a late night. We left the club just after two, when I’d normally stay until five or six.

We had a late breakfast in bed and flicked through the tabloids. My assistant had texted me to look out for the gossip column in the Comet, and I gazed at the feature in amusement.

According to the features writer, I’d become another aging rock star. I was now feeling every one of my thirty-six years and had gone home early—and alone—after failing to hook up. There was a blurry picture of me standing next to Karinetta, a model that was in the club last night, as we shared a large joint in the open air. Then a library shot of Gallina, another model, who claimed to be distressed I’d ignored her. Apparently we had a relationship earlier this year. We did? It was news to me.

To my relief there was no mention of Daisy. I could be wrong, but I figured she’d hate to be plastered all over the gossip columns.

Today we were heading up to Wales for Daisy to go back to her job as nanny for my brother’s kid. She looked preoccupied with something and I thought hard about how to distract her.

“So tell me, Daisy, mis-quoting The Killers lyrics last night, where did you live when you were young?”

It worked. She turned back to me, a smile hovering across her lips. “I grew up in Warrington. We lived on the edge of a huge park. All I could see from my bedroom window was fields and trees, and I was convinced we lived in the country. We moved to Stockport when I was eight. It seemed so busy at first.” She chattered on while I watched her, enjoying the dimples flashing in her cheeks, and feeling horny at the thought of the incredibly sexy underwear I knew she wore today. I felt so damned comfortable with her. There was no pressure with Daisy, no reputation to live up to. With her I could relax and be myself.

The short flight from London to Manchester was uneventful. Her woebegone face, at the charges that had amassed on her car park ticket, made me smile, even as she refused to let me pay. I insisted on driving though, I quite liked her funky little Honda Civic. And instead of heading up the motorway to North Wales, I diverted towards Stockport, in the suburbs.

I’d been thinking about this for a while. My childhood had been fucked up, and only redeemed by AJ, my half-brother, but Daisy loved her family. I burned with curiosity about them.

She was flicking through her iPod looking for something, when she realised we’d gone the wrong way. “You missed the turning. Maybe I’d better drive after all.” She looked amused, then surprised when I shook my head.

“Nope. I thought it was time to meet your parents. You don’t mind do you?”

Her mouth dropped open, formed a perfect O of surprise and I smirked back at her. “Catching flies, babe?”

“My parents? You want to meet my parents?” Uh oh, was that just surprise or something stronger?

“Yeah.” I shrugged and grinned at her. “Is it a problem? Don’t you ever take your friends home?”

“Well, sometimes…” She was clearly lost for words and I felt another stirring of alarm.

“Will they be home?”

“Mum should be. Dad gets in around six. Charlie are you sure about this? I mean really sure?”

Sighing, I flicked the indicator and pulled off the road into a side street where I killed the engine, before turning to face her. “Yeah, I thought you might be pleased. Is there some reason you don’t want me to meet them? Are you ashamed of me, Daisy?”

“No, don’t be silly.” I had to say, she didn’t sound very convincing. I watched her groping for words. “I don’t usually take boys—men—home. They’ll probably give you the third degree, ask if you’re planning to marry me, all that sort of crap. It’s a big deal, me taking someone home.”

“Uh huh. So an aging rock star, with a well publicised history of drug abuse, might not be their first choice of boyfriend?” I pretended to sound hurt, but actually felt amused. “Why don’t we just pop in to say hello. We don’t need to stay or anything.” A thought struck me. “They do know you work for AJ, don’t they? Nanny to a rock family?”

There was a long pause, her eyes flicked to me, a huge grin fighting to escape. “No. They have no idea.”

I laughed out loud. “So who the hell do they think you work for? Some oil tycoon?”

She shrugged, blushing furiously. “I’m vague. He’s in import/export and travels a lot. They don’t need to know.”

For some reason, this struck me as hilarious. “So will they recognise me?”

She shook her head, brown eyes flashing mischievously. “I shouldn’t think so. How would you like me to introduce you?”

“Let’s just play it by ear.” Oh the possibilities were endless. This could be such fun.



Part 3 coming next month…